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| Your Parents’ Feelings | Sadness
Your sadness is a signal of your concern. Often this experience can help her “grow up” and realize life a bit more maturely. Keep in mind to assure your daughter you love her and be honest and tell her that the talk you will have now may be broader, may be more intimate, and may be less comfortable at first. But trust – keep talking. Don’t pretend this never happened. Let this be a growing point for you – and her.
Anger
Actually, you have the right to feel anger and it may be useful for you to have another adult to talk to. Remember that name-calling and criticism don’t prevent future mistakes. Make time to talk when tempers are calm – and listen. Don’t give up on her.
Rejected
Your daughter may have made a different choice than you would have, and she may have different options of morality, but she hasn’t rejected you. She is just making a choice that is best for her at this time in her life.
Speaking with a trusted friend or your spiritual advisor may help you support your daughter and yourself. You may read the thoughts of the Religious Coalition for Reproductive Choice or Catholics for a Free Choice.
Protective
No parent can be aware of what their children are doing 24 hours a day. If you cover her, you will only mutilate her ability to make good choices for her life.
Failure
No parent can be completely responsible for their children’s behavior – good or bad. You can only teach and guide. Sometimes, experience is the best teacher.
This is a challenging time – it can be a growing time and your new relationship really can be deeper and better.
Hurt and betrayed
You might think a trust has been broken and it’ll take time to mend it. Keep going to talk, give it the time and attempts needed.
Disappointment
You thought she knew better. Try to remember a time when you disappointed your parents and what you needed from them then. Tell her she is still your daughter and that you love her.
Confused and defeated
You did nothing wrong, you did your best. Now you can try to help her.
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